Setting Expectations

Here we are- just a few days before my first Triathlon.  Even writing those words together- “My” and “Triathlon” are still a little foreign to me.  I know that I have been working toward this goal for almost 6 months- and not just building up my stamina for the swim, bike and run portions, but  there has been so much mental preparation as well.  There was the signing up- because you know, once I am committed to something, there is no backing down.  Then I started researching training plans, and after those initial first laps in the pool where after  100 meters I thought I might drown in exhaustion, not letting that discourage me and instead drive me to improve.   Then there is the equipment- new running shoes (yay!), purchasing a bike (used),  learning to clip in on the bike (yeah, that was comical- 20 minutes on the first try), forgetting you are clipped in when you stop (aka- you fall over), and that is not to mention the special gloves, socks, racing belt, sunglasses, goggles, and the ever glamorous tri-suit (you know what is not attractive?  Me- in spandex.)  Anyway, I have navigated through all of that, and with the event only days away, I all mixed up with this combination of nervousness and excitement.

I think more nervous than excited, but it depends on the moment.

I know this is not an Iron Man, but for me it has nothing to do with the distance, it has everything to do with being there.  Setting a goal and accomplishing it.

Which is where the whole “setting expectations” part comes in.

Shortly after I had signed up for the race, I went and researched the previous few years winners in my age category.  I found the best times for each segment of the race, as well as the best transition times.  Clearly, I was going to beat all of these- on my first time out, nonetheless.  To say I have high expectations of myself is not a surprise, and ok, I MAY tend to set the bar a little high sometimes, but I don’t think that being a goal driven individual is a bad thing.  The challenge comes when someone such as myself sets an expectation, and then holds yourself to the standard of either you are the best- or you are not.  And if you aren’t the best, then what does that make you?  Ahhhhh…. There’s the rub.  No one sets out to say- yes, my goal is to be mediocre!  I want to come in with the rest of the pack!

Again, the lessons we are forced to learn…..

The reality is that Life has a way of happening, and in between the demands we all face, I was not always able to check every box in that very detailed training plan that I so diligently researched in the beginning.  I did not make the cycling club practices, nor was I able to complete an open water swim.  I know- all this is less than ideal.  And after my first few transitions going from a 20 mile bike to trying to run at all was nearly impossible, I seriously started to question my ability that I was going to finish, let alone make the best time. 

One giant piece of humility coming up!

Now I have a different set of expectations.  And while I jokingly tell people that my new goal is to just not have the paramedics carry me off the course, the reality is that I have faith in my ability to at least get it done.  I won’t be fast, I may have to walk (although I really hope not), but I WILL cross the finish line.  And regardless of what the official race clock shows,  I will feel like a champion when I do, because that is my own race- with myself- that I will have won.  I will have achieved my personal best by just going out and doing something that I have never done before.  I am acknowledging that just finishing  is something wonderful.  And hopefully, moving forward, I will be able to apply that same philosophy to other parts of my life- that being the best me is the best accomplishment, the best reward, that there is.

One step at a time, I know I will get to that finish line.