If you all only knew how many things I wish I could post on, but never seem to find the time to actually get them captured... or, like in this instance, I do end up writing them down, and then fail with the follow through to actually post them online. If you will indulge me, I came across this post that I wrote in, um, well, ok- it was September- but hey, it's up here now so, enjoy! : )
Let’s face it. I am not like other moms.
I am and have always been a little on the outskirts when it comes to what a “normal” mom looks like. There are times that I wish I could be that stay at home mom, connected and aware of every happening going on in their kid’s school- who likes whom, who is no longer BFF’s, the protocol for lunch room visits, who the cool teachers are and who you do NOT want your kid to be friends with. But mostly I am on the outskirts of that, and while I think I like to know the key points, the details have never been my strength.
I am just wired a little different. Believe me- I bow down to all stay at home moms- you do a job that I could never successfully accomplish. It is so much harder than what I do. In fact whenever I meet a male in the business world I make sure to ask “Does your wife work outside the home?” because God only knows you are already working in it. Anyway, in life I have always been the career driven one, the breadwinner for the last half of my marriage, and certainly make no mistakes- working outside the home is something that I take pride in and enjoy.
But, as we women know, even if you are on a strong successful career path, when you have kids the picture changes. Now you are a working mom.
When was the last time you heard someone referred to as a working dad?
Regardless, the reality is that we all do what we need to in order to get by. I travel and yes, get to stay in hotel rooms in places like Boston and Chicago, eat out and (occasionally) fly first class. I can’t tell you how many times I have had a mom say to me “What I wouldn’t give for that!” And I get it. There is a part that seems like it might be wonderful to travel (and sometimes it is, sometimes it’s not) and be independent (but lets not forget, that also means without your kids). Some moms never have to make that choice, to leave their kids with someone else because they need to work, and for me that is certainly something that I am jealous of. But I also will not make excuses- I am proud of what I do, and lucky enough to also love it. Let’s face it- I will never be that mom that knows the name of every teacher/ office manager/ library aide at their kids school, hangs out with other moms after drop off to catch up on the latest dirt, or sews a handmade Halloween costume. I am the mom that pulls items out of the dress up bin, slaps some flour on your face, and says you are now a chef- Happy Halloweeen. I am the mom that writes memos to teachers like business proposals and cc’s myself (for my records). I am the mom that would love to chat with you, except the Blackberry is permanently attached to my ear. However, I would also like to think that I am also the mom that teaches her girls that it’s ok to have a career if that is what they choose, to be independent and have a can-do attitude, and most importantly, that I love them fiercely and there is nothing I wouldn’t do for them.
But today, I get to be the “other” mom. It’s Belle’s birthday, and I took the day off work. I get to bring the homemade cupcakes into school for my daughter’s birthday, and help her pass them out at lunch. I get to see her off to school in the morning, and be waiting for her at the bus stop in the afternoon. I get the first report out of the day- minutes after it ended- and not a 10 minute phone call before bed time recapping the highlights. I get to make the dinner of her choice, and let her use the “I Am Special” plate. Today, I get to be there for it all- no distractions, no juggling appointments, no work.
Today I get to be that mom.
And the reality is that there is no right or “normal” way to be the best parent to your child; we all do the best we can, in the moment.
Because at the end of the day, there isn't really anything more important that the fact that you are just somebodys mom, regardless of what kind of mom that is.
Let’s face it. I am not like other moms.
I am and have always been a little on the outskirts when it comes to what a “normal” mom looks like. There are times that I wish I could be that stay at home mom, connected and aware of every happening going on in their kid’s school- who likes whom, who is no longer BFF’s, the protocol for lunch room visits, who the cool teachers are and who you do NOT want your kid to be friends with. But mostly I am on the outskirts of that, and while I think I like to know the key points, the details have never been my strength.
I am just wired a little different. Believe me- I bow down to all stay at home moms- you do a job that I could never successfully accomplish. It is so much harder than what I do. In fact whenever I meet a male in the business world I make sure to ask “Does your wife work outside the home?” because God only knows you are already working in it. Anyway, in life I have always been the career driven one, the breadwinner for the last half of my marriage, and certainly make no mistakes- working outside the home is something that I take pride in and enjoy.
But, as we women know, even if you are on a strong successful career path, when you have kids the picture changes. Now you are a working mom.
When was the last time you heard someone referred to as a working dad?
Regardless, the reality is that we all do what we need to in order to get by. I travel and yes, get to stay in hotel rooms in places like Boston and Chicago, eat out and (occasionally) fly first class. I can’t tell you how many times I have had a mom say to me “What I wouldn’t give for that!” And I get it. There is a part that seems like it might be wonderful to travel (and sometimes it is, sometimes it’s not) and be independent (but lets not forget, that also means without your kids). Some moms never have to make that choice, to leave their kids with someone else because they need to work, and for me that is certainly something that I am jealous of. But I also will not make excuses- I am proud of what I do, and lucky enough to also love it. Let’s face it- I will never be that mom that knows the name of every teacher/ office manager/ library aide at their kids school, hangs out with other moms after drop off to catch up on the latest dirt, or sews a handmade Halloween costume. I am the mom that pulls items out of the dress up bin, slaps some flour on your face, and says you are now a chef- Happy Halloweeen. I am the mom that writes memos to teachers like business proposals and cc’s myself (for my records). I am the mom that would love to chat with you, except the Blackberry is permanently attached to my ear. However, I would also like to think that I am also the mom that teaches her girls that it’s ok to have a career if that is what they choose, to be independent and have a can-do attitude, and most importantly, that I love them fiercely and there is nothing I wouldn’t do for them.
But today, I get to be the “other” mom. It’s Belle’s birthday, and I took the day off work. I get to bring the homemade cupcakes into school for my daughter’s birthday, and help her pass them out at lunch. I get to see her off to school in the morning, and be waiting for her at the bus stop in the afternoon. I get the first report out of the day- minutes after it ended- and not a 10 minute phone call before bed time recapping the highlights. I get to make the dinner of her choice, and let her use the “I Am Special” plate. Today, I get to be there for it all- no distractions, no juggling appointments, no work.
Today I get to be that mom.
And the reality is that there is no right or “normal” way to be the best parent to your child; we all do the best we can, in the moment.
Because at the end of the day, there isn't really anything more important that the fact that you are just somebodys mom, regardless of what kind of mom that is.
You ROCK, Chris! :-)
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